Thursday, March 26, 2009

God is Good

Dear Friends,

I just closed my books, and stretched. I have a few minutes now, and will try to pull my thoughts together enough to write an update with some semblance of chronology and coherency. We shall see.

As you know, my sister left three days ago. It was refreshing to be able to bounce my thoughts and ideas off of her, and I was very glad for the excuse to be able to push some of my normal activities to the back burner and take a breather. It was such pleasant, relaxed month! By contrast, I always feel something like a rudderless boat after a visitor leaves: little bit disconnected, unfocused, and generally feeling like I wouldn’t be any worse off for a good shake or a splash of cold water. It will pass. It always does. In a week or two, I’ll feel normal again (whatever that may be). Meanwhile, I try to keep busy so that I don’t have too much thinking time.

And it’s not difficult to find things to keep busy with. My teacher from the last semester, Ms. Oh, is writing an ‘introduction to Korean’ book for Western beginners. Her English is not really that good, so I’m not sure why she’s the one writing it. But, be that as it may, she needs a lot of help correcting and proof reading. So she gives me her papers, I cover them with red, and then we get together for coffee or lunch, and discuss the corrections I’ve made. In return, she has offered to help tutor me. I haven’t yet taken her up on the offer, though. She’s a sweet lady, but her teaching style drives me nuts.

On Wednesday afternoons I go next door to visit with my landlady for an hour or so. She’s an elderly woman, so she doesn’t get out much, and enjoys the company. She’s also a Jehovah’s Witness, and has taken it upon herself, personally, to convert me. We first began studying the Bible/JW tracts together while I was in level 2, and she charged along at such a rate that I understood, generously, one word in ten. In those long ago days I consoled myself with the memory of how Naaman was pardoned for inadvertently bowing with his master in the temple of Rimmon, and was quite sure that God would be equally gracious to me if I inadvertently agreed to some heresy. But I can no longer be so easily let off the hook. I understand about ninety percent of the dialogue (or monologue, to be more accurate). It makes for more interesting conversation, but yesterday we got to the part where she explained to me that Jesus is merely a created being, and no deity. I can listen quietly to her beliefs of who the 144,000 are, and of where heaven is or isn’t located, but I could not, of course, let her think that I agree with her understanding of Christ. With all my heart, I was hoping the subject would never be brought up, because it would place me in such a culturally sticky situation. I’m not supposed to contradict my elders, you see. Particularly not a woman of her age. I’m not even supposed to let on that I think differently, because that would indicate that I consider my thoughts better than hers, which would reek of egotistic individualism, not to mention disrespect. My teacher once told me that the import of submission to one’s superior is so strong that Korean children are scolded when they come up with more clever ideas than their parents, even when those ideas, so far from contradicting, are in line with the adults’ thoughts. So I was in something of a pickle, trying to think how to be respectful without agreeing with that which I could not. I managed to muddle through, though I was never given enough space to explain my beliefs. Every time I began, “Yes, I can understand that, but…” she would cut me off, with “If you understand, how can you say ‘but’?” and then take her explanation back to the very beginning and go at it again. It didn’t really bother me not to be able to tell her why I think as I do, but I can become a bit mulish and ruffled when another’s ideas are shoved down my throat in such a manner, so several times I had to remind myself that the miscommunication lay not with her, but at the door of our cultural differences. She was patient with me, albeit rather excited and upset. All things end, though, and so did this. We’ll probably hash it out from the beginning all over again next week.

School wraps up in two months. Unbelievable. I do look forward to being done! I’ve applied to volunteer at an orphanage over the summer, and am hoping that I’m accepted. I need the opportunity to practice Korean in an everyday setting, but aside from that, I think it will be really good for me to invest my time and energy into something other than the language and (vicariously) myself. I hope to hear back from them by the end of this month.

Thank you all so much for the gifts that you sent with Naomi! They blessed me very much, and made me miss you all the more. But it was a good sort of missing; rather more fond than wistful. I really appreciate the amazing friendships that God has blessed me with! He is good…and I’ve just decided that that’s the only un-random thing about my life.

Fondly,
Elisabeth